Past Life

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I scroll through Instagram more than I would like to admit but every now and then, the social media gods drop gems where I either click save, ‘save post to your story’ or screenshot that bad boy and post it on my page when I too want to drop some knowledge and wisdom.

Today was no different.

During my usual perusal on the social media platform, I came across a post that said: “Be kind to all the past versions of you. They are the soil in which you now bloom” -Arielle Estoria

I personally feel attacked…in a good way. LOL.

Do you know how many times I have been mad at past me for doing things that present me and I know future me wouldn’t do?

Do you know how many times I’ve been like “if only I did this at 20” or “I shouldn’t have done that at 32” and the list goes on?

Or I’ll look back and, what’s the word kids are using now, cringe at some of the decisions I’ve made or outfits I wore for that matter. It can really mess you up sometimes.

However, why not look back and thank and forgive yourself. Forgive 12 year old you for listening to a rumor about one of your best friends instead of going to them directly and it either cost you or almost cost you your friendship. Thank yourself now for not listening to any information that doesn’t come directly from the source or having the wherewithal to find the information for yourself so you are better informed.

You learned that from a past version of yourself.

Forgive 22 year old you for staying in that long, toxic relationship with that person that didn’t appreciate you or even know how to love you properly. You may have lost yourself a little bit in the process and felt like you lost some good years. But thank yourself now for still wanting to love and be loved but also having the experience to know what you will and won’t tolerate.

You learned that from a past version of yourself.

Forgive 32 year old for not making smart decisions in regards to your family, career, finances and personal relationships. Yes you thought you knew everything because wisdom comes with age right?, however, you jumped head first without thinking. But thank yourself now for either mending those relationships, talking to experts about your situations or asking for forgiveness.

You learned that from a past version of yourself.

You see, this isn’t Back to the Future and we can’t go back to 1955 to fix all of the problems we created so our future will be better. a long long time ago I used to think that if I could have access to a time machine, my present life would be everything I wanted it to be. But would it though?

Would I have learned major life lessons? Would I have been able to weed out the people who aren’t suppose to be in my life? Would I have even been able to recognize the people that are suppose to be in my life now?

No.

We are supposed to experience various versions of ourselves. Future you is depending on past you to learn from all of these experiences so present you can prepare future you lol. Our past experiences happen for a reason. Even the nadir experiences you wish to forget.

We learn and heal from all of them in order for us to navigate our present and future. What happens to us doesn’t necessarily define all of who we are but it can and will shape how we walk on the rest of our path.

Don’t be ashamed of what you experienced, whether you were the aggressor, the victim or became both sides of the coin at one point. Don’t be ashamed of how you initially reacted in situations because now you can evaluate how you will forge the rest of your interactions.

Don’t be ashamed of all of the versions of you that got you right here, right now, in this moment.

You can thank the past version of yourself for present you.

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